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October birthstone

So one of the most touching gifts I received was a necklace with 3 birthstone baby rings on it. I love it and I haven’t taken it off since I got it on the day of the funeral. McKenna’s ring is diamonds, Adele’s is emeralds, and Tristan… poor Tristan. His is tourmaline- a bright pink stone. So Neil and I were talking about it and we decided he must have been a high fashion baby. Pink- it’s the new baby blue!

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Here are all the maternity pictures that Kristy took. Again, thank you Kristy- I will cherish these forever.mat pic 3

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Tristan 244

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All together at last

All together at last

At 12:42 p.m. on October 12th, our little miracle came into the world. His dark hair was so evident that before Dr. Clark cut the amniotic sac she could see it and called Neil over to look. He then had the privilege of cutting the cord, and I listened intently for the sound of Tristan’s little cry. Please baby, cry! I thought over and over. Finally it came and i had tears in my eyes I was trying to blink away so that I could see my baby clearly when Dr. Clark held him up over the blue drape for me. They quickly took his heart rate, wrapped him in a blanket and without the usual rituals of weighing and measuring, handed him to Neil.  Neil brought him around to my head and sat there with me holding Tristan’s head against my cheek as they sewed me back up. It seemed to take forever. The nurse told us his heart rate was low and we could tell his color was not good. I was scared that we weren’t going to make it out of the OR with Tristan alive. At last they took  the curtain down and wheeled us back to the L & D room where everyone was waiting.

Sucking his fingers

Sucking his fingers

When the nurses finished hooking me up to all the monitors, Neil handed me Tristan and I held him for the first time. I was amazed at this little person with dark curly hair and dark eyes and just kept wondering how long he would stay with us. McKenna and Adele both got up on the bed with me and took turns admiring their brother.

McKenna was SO anxious to hold him and I was completely shocked by Adele’s reaction. Lately she has been so jealous of any other child that gets near me. McKenna often gets hit, pinched, or hair pulled if Adele doesn’t like her proximity to me! But as she looked at Tristan, she just got excited and kept saying “Baby!” She didn’t try to get him away from me or anything.

After I had the chance to hold him for a while, Neil took him and announced that he was ready to give him a name and a blessing (kind of  what other churches call a christening). The blessing Neil gave was beautiful and left little doubt to anyone what a special spirit this baby was. It was amazing because after the blessing Tristan pinked up quite a bit and his breathing seemed to improve as well. Nurses doing my vitals also checked Tristan’s heart rate at our request and this too had improved to a normal range.

Proud parents

Proud parents

At this point we started passing Tristan around, and almost everyone got the chance to hold him. That’s saying a lot- there were aunts, uncles, grandmas, grandpas, cousins, and many close friends. So many teary eyes. The photographer from “Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep” was there. She got a family photo of Tristan with Neil and me and the girls. She also took many other shots and I am so excited to see how they turned out. We never really got a break but Neil and I had both thought that this day would be for everyone who wanted, to be able to meet Tristan.

So later that evening, Julie, our NILMDTS photographer came back to get some shots of us after I had recovered a bit. So many pictures that I know I will treasure. THANK YOU SO MUCH JULIE!

McKenna loves Tristan

McKenna loves Tristan

Adele loves Tristan

Adele loves Tristan

We moved to a tiny gloomy room out of the maternity ward. When we were moved, the nurse over there informed us that they did not have diapers or formula so we would have to get our own if we needed them. Yeah, I’ll just run to Smith’s and pick those up! They had no idea what to do with Tristan. While the nurse was doing my vitals, I asked if she could take Tristan’s heart rate and said she needed to talk to the pediatrician about what they could do for Tristan, first. It was like he was no longer a patient at all!

When Beth and Joan came over from Rainbow Kids, Beth stepped out to talk to the nursing director. She got us moved to a big bright room in the new maternity ward. Apparently, somewhere along the line the message was passed along that we didn’t want anything done for Tristan and that we would feel better not being around the well babies. THANK YOU BETH for straightening out that misunderstanding!

Visitors continued into the late evening and we asked the last of the visitors to leave at 10. The nurse came to take my vitals and Tristan’s heart rate. 110- still in normal range. Neil and I took turns holding him and by 10:30 I was dozing with Tristan cuddled up on  my chest. I woke up to admire him and see if Neil wanted another turn. We talked about how we didn’t want to go to sleep, we didn’t want to miss out on any time we could have with Tristan.

At this point Tristan started crying.  I tried breastfeeding him- for the umpteenth time- just in case he might want it. No luck. Tried the bottle and he didn’t want that. Neil changed him and he was messy but he continued to cry. After everything we could think of, he still cried. I actually enjoyed the sound and told Neil that it was probably a good thing. From what I understood, he would probably be too weak towards the end to be able to cry. We got out the video camera and recorded his voice. Then the crying stopped and he only made a few newborn noises as I curled him up with his head of soft hair under my chin.

Our beautiful boy

Our beautiful boy

I started to doze as the nurse came back in to take my vitals. She then helped me to unwrap Tristan to take his heart rate. She listened and adjusted her stethoscope and listened again. He’s gone… she can’t find his heart beat. But I didn’t want to believe it and neither did she. She readjusted and listened again. I whispered for Neil who was on the computer and didn’t know what was going on yet. The nurse went to get the pediatrician.

I looked at the clock. 11:25. We had been counting the hours of his life.  More than we expected but what never could have been enough time. Here it was- 18 minutes short of 11 whole hours- the entire lifetime of our son, Tristan Neil Wyatt.

This is probably my favorite so far, despite the stethoscope being in the shot. I love his soft expression and open eyes.

This is probably my favorite so far, despite the stethoscope being in the shot. I love his open eyes.

UsArae and I would once again like to tell everyone thanks for your thoughts and prayers on our behalf.
We wanted to let everyone know that we have planned a memorial service for Tristan on Saturday October 17, 2009. The service will begin at 1:00 P.M. at the LDS Stake Center located at 619 W 5750 S in Murray.
Anyone who would like to attend is more than welcome.
In lieu of flowers, small donations to cover funeral expenses would be greatly appreciated!

Arae and Neil are in the maternity patient rooms.  They are in room number 2102.  This is for any of you who might be thinking of going to visit her.

Arae called this morning and they are doing fairly well today.  They appreciate all the wonderful support that so many of you have given them whether it be through prayers or small acts of service.  They wanted me to let you know that they would welcome visitors today!  Thank you all for everything you do!  You are truly amazing!

Arae sent this text and requested that I post it.

Tristan passed away at 11:25 pm last night.  We are grateful for the time we were able to spend with him.  It was more than we expected.  We are doing okay and definitely feel the strength of all your prayers and Heavenly Father’s love for us.

Arae and Neil have expressed that they would like some uninterrupted family time today.  They need some time to take in everything that has happened and grieve their loss.   I am sure that emails or comments on the blog would be much appreciated.  As they become ready for visitors or phone calls, I will update everyone.  Thanks again for all the prayers in their behalf.

Tristan Neil Wyatt passed away last night at approximately 11:40 pm.  He was with us for only eleven hours, but has made such an impact with his sweet little spirit.  The memorial services are set to be held on Saturday, October 17th at 1:00 pm.  I will send an update with further details as I come by them.  Thank you for all your prayers on the Wyatt’s behalf.  They are so greatly appreciated!  – Nancy

Arae and Neil have had a busy day.  After Tristan’s birth, they were able to give him a name and a blessing.  They were also able to get some family pictures and some video.  The girls were able to hold their brother before going home for some much needed rest.  There has really been such an outpouring of love and support.  Arae and Neil have requested that they be allowed some family time without visitors tomorrow until around noon.  They would like to have some alone time with Tristan and close family.  I will keep you posted as the situation changes.

Tristan Neil made his entrance today at 12:42 pm.  He weighs 6 lbs 11 oz.   His heart rate was a little low in the operating room, but he has since pinked up and his heart rate went up to almost normal.  Arae is doing fine and everyone seems to be holding up pretty well.   Those who would like to come visit are welcome!  Thanks for all the prayers!